Sarcasm, Julian Smith and missing you!

I miss you! It is an inevitable truth…

Mostly it is because of all of the quirky and weird stuff that you are probably the only person to ever understand. The fake boyfriend is a very fine example.  Not many understand why Pretend Peter and Make-believe Mark are necessary – but they are – because they have never meet an insisting guy and actually found a certain way of getting rid of him. And as you very nicely pointed out it is very important to have all the details in place. Pretend Peter is through-and-through fantastic. He plays volleyball, knows that I prefer white roses over red ones and he is currently doing further studies in USA at Berkeley. He is good looking and actually only has one fault; he gets really jealous, but that is mostly handy to be honest.

But besides our amazing fake boyfriends you and I also have so many other things that I – only after you left – found that other people don’t get. I always expected that we were cool and on the beat when we quoted the right American TV shows and read all the right Internet blogs – but apparently not. People in Denmark (by Denmark I mean the very small focus group in Holstebro, Western Jutland) don’t find Julian Smith funny!*

Even the picture is funny!

How is it possible not to find racist coffee or red eye flashes twice funny?! I really don’t get it. And instead of the “aaaaww”  or “crying from laughter” reaction I normally receive when I introduce someone to the wonders of ‘Pink Fluffy Unicorns Dancing on Rainbows’ I just got weird looks and sort of got the feeling that people were thinking of having me institutionalised.

And what about sarcasm, since when did the beautiful art that it is die? It is like the rest if the world has turned into Sheldon’s (In case people don’t get this obvious reference I am referring to Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory). Sarcasm is fantastic and an art – we should even get state funding for it! I might want to end every sarcastic comment or remark with  bazinga – though that is not the proper use of the word – or maybe just get myself a sarcasm sign. In any case I see a dark future ahead.

Derived from my statement above I can say with uttermost certainty that very few people will find my next part funny in any way, but I do this for you – because I’m jut that sort of friend!

Since I find halfway depressed, sleep deprived and unable to eat a sort of illness – here goes:

“Soft kitty,

warm kitty,

little ball of fur.

Happy kitty,

sleepy kitty,

pur pur purr.”

* I have later done further research in a yet smaller, though geographically larger, focus group; still not getting the laughs I’m used to.

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